KINGMAKER chronicles


Desnus 1
I have a feeling I am going to prefer life on the road. Interacting with people and trying to please them back in Cuus’s alchemy lab is insidious. But today, I’m breaking out – like a seed in the ground – let this old carapace die in the dirt, because I’m going up. Newness often comes from the death of things, and I’m ready for something new.
I’ve decided to record these travels for future reference. Weeks ago, Cuus aided me in finding a band of explorers seeking to go South to “see” the land. One of which is a half-orc like himself. There are two others in our party but stayed behind one more night to celebrate in Brevoy. Karn, the half-orc and I set out early this morning. We might as well have stayed and partied, however, because we didn’t make it far before running into a pig dog den. My qlaive skills are rusty and I only managed to cut one of the dog’s ears off. If Karn hadn’t been there with his great-ass axe to chop their heads off, I’m not sure what would have happened. Karn is an easygoing, and skilled Summoner, I think he will make a great member. I suppose our encounter was profitable, we found Alchemist’s fire and a few other treasures (Bacon) – as well as a taste of the life that lies before us. I hope the future tastes like bacon. As much as I wanted to smile at Karn or suck the life from one of the pig dogs, I refrained. I can’t have anyone knowing my origins yet. I will spend my first night on the grassy green ground enjoying the darkness like a comforter. Spring is softer here out in the un-tread lands. It’s welcoming and dangerous.


Desnus 2
I got bacon again today. But before that, our two party members caught up with us; Rosalee the Cleric and Nisa the HobGoblin Fighter. I could see them more clearly now that we were out of Brevoy. Rosalee sparkled in the sunlight a bit and was kind enough to heal all the bite wounds I had clumsily acquired from the pig dogs. Shortly into our trek we visited a very abandoned town, so abandoned all that was left was a needle and rope. As we carried on, we began to follow stone signs with the marks “OTP”. There were no more run-ins with pig dogs – only beautiful prairie flowers, and no trees to micturate behind. As the sun was setting we fortunately arrived at “Oleg’s Trading Post” ( I’d hoped it stood for “Oh Thanks Pal”). The trading post was simple; a few buildings, animals and hired hands. Oleg also seemed simple, and at peace, and racist, maybe? I suppose he may not like dealing with most people, which is relatable. Rose sensed good things from him. On the other hand, even Nisa noticed Oleg’s wife, Svetlana was disrupted by her surroundings. Luckily, I did not taste any of her discontentment in the meal of bacon and bread she made us for dinner. It was delicious. I noticed she did not wear a wedding band, and wondered how far her discontentment had gone. During dinner conversation we learned more of “OTP”; including the loss due to bandits at the start of each month. Oleg had almost lost his hand in the most recent raid – if Svetlana hadn’t offered up her wedding ring in exchange. It’s safe to say, we’re all up for an adventure and made a deal with Oleg concerning the bandits: Free stay at OTP, 3 potions, 50 gp and 10% off items we buy from Oleg – if the bandits stay away for 8? Weeks. Svetlana kindly kicked their pet pig out of the trough so that I could take a dark bath before bed. As we headed to our sleeping quarters, I noticed Svetlana headed to the shack nearby, obviously to sleep. 

Desnus 3
Sure enough, morning came and we had bandits for breakfast. No, but I wish.
The bandits did arrive as Oleg anticipated and our first combat as a party ensued. The four bandits proved to be skilled archers and took out Karn along with his summoned eidolon, Shima. Once we knocked out their leader, Nisa and I were able to chase them down. This time my glaive skills returned to me and I slashed them. Nisa’s archery skills really saved us too. Rose tended to Karn’s injuries. She was surprisingly nimble despite the ale I saw her add to her oatmeal this morning. We decorated the tree near the entrance to OTP with bandit-ornaments to ward off future hostility. Then we gathered our new possessions: four horses with saddle bags. I ended up with a brown horse, which I bestowed the name Mousse. We spent the evening resting at OTP. Rose celebrated our victory and offered her flask to us. I was surprised at her offer. Why is she being kind to me?


Desnus 4
Today we rode 25 miles South West to explore and look for the bandits hideout, but were halted by an enormous centipede. I was tempted to turn and run. However, Nisa reminded us that we are here to face our foes, and conquer them. Before I realized it, the damn Pede snatched my horse Mousse and nearly took out Karn. My glaive kept missing the centipede’s shimmy-ing movements. The other members advanced against it. Karn, in his Orc-ferocity gave a final blow, killing the Pede and then falling unconscious. It was too late, Mousse had become dessert. I grieved the abrupt loss of my sweet new transportation. 
After attending to Karn, the others wanted to move on to explore the area. Despite the numbness of losing my horse, I noticed the area was very beautiful. It was a wooded area decorated with unusual trees. We also came across large foliage protruding from the ground, as well as, enormous, red bulbas things. Radishes! Karn fed part of one to Shima, soon enough it was fast asleep. Rose observed that the radishes are sleep inducing. Just beyond the magical radish patch we came across sleeping fish-like creatures. The party discovered that they are troglodytes and evil. Nisa stealthily crept up and killed all four of them all in their sleep, while we watched. After we passed a toppled stag statue, we decided to gather a few radishes and head back to OTP. We arrived at dusk and presented Oleg with an enormous radish as a gift. He loved it. We took inventory and bought potions and things from Oleg. At dinner Svetlana inquired whether we had found her wedding ring. Karn named the wooded area we explored “ Rad Nap Hollow”.

Desnus 5
Today was mostly a rest day to hang around OTP (“Old Trog Poop”). In the evening Nisa was sneaking around the main building trying to get an idea about Oleg. But she uncharacteristically tripped knocking a bunch of things over. Oleg came in, laughed and helped pick it up. We headed to bed, but were awakened at 1am (Desnus 6) by visitors entering the trading post. Rose and Nisa jumped up and went to spy on the scene. Karn sent his eidolon as well. The main visitor with an eloquent quiver and a scar over his left eye, handed Oleg a scroll case. Oleg whistled and Kestrel his hired hand joined the scene. Oleg invited two of the men inside and nervously searched until he pulled out some paperwork. Things seemed to be peaceful so we headed back to bed. Kestrel and Osgood also tried to join us in our sleeping quarters but were sent to the shed by Oleg.

Desnus 6
It was a misty morning – we were all up early to keep an eye on the visitors. Especially Nisa. Had she even gone to bed? After Kestrel made us breakfast, we finally introduced ourselves to the visitors. The main guy’s name was Keston Garrus, and had three men with him; half elven triplets called the Kel brothers. We discovered that they were paid to come from Brevoy and help OTP. Rose, with her charisma, revealed that their attitude towards us was unfriendly. Rose and I split off from the group and followed them a bit, with a sense motive Rose discovered that they are here for other reasons than what they told us. Oleg pulled us aside and requested that we don’t fight with Keston. Tonight we decided to take shifts doing a night watch. Where is our HobGoblin? I thought she was on first watch with Rose, but the last thing I saw was her clothes on the ground in our quarters and some chortling black creature rolling in the mud. I was too tired to care. Abruptly woken from my sleep again, I hear Nisa mumble something in the dark about “..welcome.” and then Oleg barges in to wake us up with news: “Keston is dead.” He suspects it was the bandits and asks us to look around with him. Oleg wrapped Keston in a tarp and the Kel brothers spoke of Keston’s past revealing he was banished and ended up becoming a mercenary in Restov. Karn invited them into our party, but they did not seem interested, maybe they are too grieved to think of that right now.

Kingmaker Previous Session Notes

Serenith 14: 
BANDIT HUNT: It is dusk and the party goes bandit hunting! Left the burning wreckage behind and headed south. Twas a clear-moon lit night as we headed towards the forest and a river. Cross a river and discover the bandit camp. As we approach, Nisa investigates and finds a ravine, 20+ captives tied up, 10 horses and 1 donkey (dumbass). There is a cliff on one side. Nisa gives a sword to one of the captives (Dingle) and tells him to start freeing the others. Rose enlarges and shields herself – dang, that's a lot a Assimar – Barth takes on Bear's Endurance and prepares his spells, Alu receives Mage's armor and Protection from arrows, and Nisa rolls in the mud. Woot, ready for for battle.

AMBUSH: Nisa is attacked from the cliff behind with raining arrows, and receives a crap ton of damage. The Stag Lord whispers in her ear something about knowing herself and her enemies. She books it into the trees near us. Stag Lord knows our names. Pig dogs - Alu bombs them, Barth also attacks them. Rose Stomps and does sound damage to Sag Lord. The fight continues with Barth casting some sick spells, and NIsa picking off bandits with her bow. We decide to make our way around and up the cliff to find Sag Lord, Alu hitches a ride on the Great Rose, meanwhile bats bites bring her hp down even more. Barth casts a strong spell, but it is eluded. We kill Sag Lord only to find he was a slave wearing Stag Lord's mask.

CHASE: We mount horses and chase after the Sag Lord beyond the cliff. There is a Druid with him, and Rose casts silence, but it doesn't affect him. Nisa continues to hit with arrows! Barth casts Oppressive Boredom and Color Spray and Stuns them. Alu takes their weapons and Bombs them. Eventually we kill Stag Lord! However his Druid sidekick absorbs into the Rock like a moody teenager, and we have to kill a whole hour before finishing him off.

BOOTY: helm, amulet, ring

Battle Reports- Standards and Details

Welcome Batreppers!

My studio is about twenty-five foot square, with a single table in the middle.  When you arrive*, I will have the place tidied up and the terrain set up.  Sometimes, you may need to set up the terrain in which case a bin will be on hand.

I am located near Liberty Park in downtown Salt Lake City.  If you want to set up your first round, contact me at 

I will have two side tables ready.  These are for your armies and equipment.  You will set up your painted armies there for a preamble video showing your forces.  During the report, keep the table clear of dice and other paraphernalia, as well as soda cans etc.  Don't break the illusion!

You will use my camera, getting it all on a single SD card.  We don't edit our batreps.  I just string them together and upload them.  So be sure to get it right the first time!

Make sure the door to the main house is closed and locked the whole time.

A battle report is worth a credit of $X, agreed on ahead of time.  This amount is a total for both players, not each.  So, if it were a $50 credit that would be the total to split between the two players.  Thus, a friend and yourself could theoretically get whole new armies by just doing so many battle reports.  If you did twenty at (say) $50, that would be $1000 retail.

The credit can only be used for commonly available items, that would come through a local game shop (such as Games Workshop plastics, but not Forge World).  You can pick up your items at Blakfyre Games in Pleasant Grove or my studio.  If you give me seven to fourteen days heads up, I can have your items ready for pickup on completion of the battle report.  But you can just keep your credit on tap if you want.  You can also use your credit on  Tell me ahead of time which lots you want.

Camera work should be steady and stay focused on the actions (dice rolls, models, or speaker).  Don't drift off!  Look through the camera lens when filming.

I have painted armies you can use.  Be careful with them, put everything back when done, and set aside any broken figures for repair.  If you use your own army, it has to be completely painted with no proxies (but alternate sculpts are allowed and encouraged!)

Clean up when you're done.

Elements of a professional grade battle report:

  • Batrep is a product demonstration
  • Have fun.  Show two humans having a good time with good sportsmanship
  • One Take
  • Rated G
  • Show figures in best light, no figures jumbled together
  • Keep food and drink on side tables
  • No shirts with logos
  • 16mm dice with clear pips, no logos/symbols
  • Keep camera steady and on the action
  • Enthusiastically narrate what is happening
  • Educate both novice and expert
  • No music in the background
  • Stop the action periodically to show how a unit works or make comments on tactics
  • Look up rules off camera, then show what you found (page number)
  • WYSIWYG is preferred but there is wiggle room on weapons/armament 
  • Tabling your opponent on turn 02 doth not a batrep make!   Unless you want to talk tactics for an hour after that

Armies available:
Grey Knights

Beasts of Chaos
Dropzone Commander (two armies)

You can do a battle report for 40K (the best option), or Age of Sigmar, or skirmish games such as Kill Team and WarCry.  Infinity, War Machine, any of those would be cool.

If you finished a battle report in three hours, that would be a surprise.  It usually takes four or five hours, with filming, to get one done.

If you are good at it, you will be asked back and paid more.  Looking forward to meeting you.


*smelling good.  You should be showered and deodorized.  I will notice.


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